Finding myself...

I can't put into words the last two nights of sleep. I don't dream very often and when I do, I very seldom remember my dreams. But once again I am faced with not just one, but two very vivid dreams. The first dream was Wednesday night and I was in the delivery room giving birth to our third daughter. Those who know me know we only have two daughters, but would love to have another child. The second dream was just last night. A "sit down" talk with both my father and husband at once to tell me that they both fully support my desire to go back to school.

Now I'm not a psychologist. I don't know the first thing about how to interpret dreams. I do, however, know that both of these topics are so close to my heart that it is obvious my psyche is conflicted. I try not to think about one because there isn't really anything more we can do and the other, well, that scares me more than the little red and black snake I found the other day.

I've always been able to tell when something is bothering me because it is manifested in my dreams, conflicts with others especially. I will usually finally confront what ever has been bothering me face on and get everything out in the open. It's then that I recognize something needs to be done because obviously the issue is upsetting me more than I realized. I wonder if that is the situation this time too. I know who I am. I know what I want. So what do you do when what you want and what you are getting are two different things? I wish finding myself could be a little easier.